Bring back your beginner mindset
Most of the time we are experts - putting our hard earned skills and knowledge to work. But rediscovering our beginner mindset means we can show up with more curiosity, empathy, and open-mindedness.
For most of my sporting career I have been an expert. But 18 months ago I retired from professional sport. Ever since I have been a beginner.
I’ve spent the time embarking on an eclectic mix of new sports. I suck at all of them so far.
And that’s amazing.
‘In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few.’ ~ Shunryu Suzuki
An expert knows how to do things. A beginner creatively experiments with new ways of doing things.
An expert has clear performance expectations, and is unhappy when they don’t meet them. A beginner can be cheerful just being in the game.
An expert learns to focus on being right. A beginner is simply open to learning.
An expert can be reluctant to risk failure. A beginner has permission to cheerfully stumble over new skills.
An expert expects themselves to know the answer. A beginner is open to listening to new sources of information.
Most of the time - when you’re offering to drive me somewhere, managing my money, running my social media campaign, or helping me buy my first house - we want the expert.
But sometimes - when it’s helpful to show up with more curiosity, empathy, and open-mindedness - we want a beginner mindset.
What does that mean?
Indoor skydiving
‘$70?’ I had just touched down at the airport in Queenstown New Zealand. The taxi driver was trying to fleece me for the 12 minute trip into town. ‘That’s outrageous!’ The driver simply shrugged.
‘Want to split a ride?’ I asked a guy also haggling with his driver.
‘Do you juggle?’ I asked. He had juggling clubs peeking out of his backpack.
‘I’m learning,’ he told me. ‘But my real passion is high lining - tight rope walking between mountains.’
I thought I liked adventure, but suddenly my trampolining skills were looking pretty tame.
‘And do live here in Queenstown. What do you do?’
‘I’m a cameraman,’ he said.
‘What do you film?’‘Skydivers. I compete in the sport too. My crew are training in the wind tunnel tomorrow, you should join us.’
12 hours later I was hovering in the air turning circles.
A beginner mindset means you say ‘yes’ to trying crazy ideas.
Fencing
‘I’ve got your next sport,’ my first manager, now a friend, called me as soon as I announced my retirement from beach volleyball. ‘Within a few years you could be representing Australia.’
‘What is it?’
‘Fencing.’
It turns out that the people you get to know through work often have hidden and niche skills. Keir knew the national fencing coach and had been doing the sport for decades. Swords are pretty badass, and it’s hard to say no to a one-on-one lesson from the National coach. Needless to say, I was pretty excited to become a Samurai.
My first lesson was an hour. And we spent 45 minutes on footwork - two shuffles forward. Two shuffles back. Lunge. Repeat.
A beginner mindset means you are willing to spend time on the boring basics.
Snow skiing
‘You’re fast,’ my mum told me. ‘And you stay low, that’s good.’ It was high praise coming from her - in her twenties she was a ski instructor who split her time between Australia and Austria - endless winter.
‘Awesome. And, what are these poles for exactly?’ I asked.
She rolled her eyes. ‘I was going to mention your turns…’
A beginner mindset means you set your ego aside and don’t mind asking the dumb questions.
Jiu jitsu
I walked into class assuming I’d walk out with skills like Jackie Chan.
‘Wrap your arms around them, then your legs, and squeeze,’ the instructor demonstrated the move on an unsuspecting participant who was slowly turning red.
‘Ready?’ asked my practice partner as he arranged his limbs around me. The sport is a complex tangle of figuring out where to place your hands, feet, elbows…
Day 1 of Jiu Jitsu was less like Jackie Chan, and more like aggressive cuddling.
A beginner mindset means letting go of performance expectations.
Surfing
I started with a weekend surf trip down the southern coast of California - everyone else knew what they were doing.
Me… I think they call what I did the ‘washing machine’. Churned up in the waves, buffeted against the ocean floor, and spat out.
In hindsight, maybe those waves were a little large for a first timer.
Later, I took a lesson in the calmer waters of Venice Beach. ‘You’re good at paddling in, and you have good balance on the board,’ my instructor told me (I figured after my washing machine attempts it was time to pay someone). ‘But you’re still not allowed to pick your own waves!’
A beginner mindset means throwing yourself in the deep end and having a go.
Kite surfing
It turns out they don’t believe in positive reinforcement in the Philippines.
‘3 days, 6 hours a day…?’ asked the kite school owner
‘Let’s do it!’ said my brother. Committing us both to learning this new sport.
First we learnt to fly the giant kite. Not so bad. Like being a kid again.
Then, how to get started in the water. Lots of standing up and then sinking.
‘Here,’ my instructor passed my helmet back to me. He’d tied me a walkie talkie in a ziplock bag to the top. I looked at him in confusion. ‘It’s time to try on your own.’
Sit in the water, strap the board on, navigate the kite overhead, then dip it and… takeoff! I was up. Skimming on the water. Trying to balance. Trying to keep the kite at the perfect angle. Picking up speed, faster, faster, faster…
And at the same time my Filipino instructor shouted through the walkie talkie: ‘Lean back, not that much. Kite higher. Too high. Arms extended. You’re going too fast. Kite higher. Higher. Lean more. Not like that..!’
Crash.
And we repeated that pattern for 3 days until I managed to stay up long enough to kite surf out of walkie talkie range.
A beginners mindset means every time you fail, you get up again.
Circus
‘Just… let go?’
I was 8 meters in the air, with red silks wrapped tightly around me in an intricate knot. A knot I hope I’d contorted myself correctly to tie. Circus lessons.
‘Let go!’ yelled the instructor. He looked tiny standing on the mats way down below me.
‘Did you even watch me do the wrap?’ I asked.
‘You’ll be fine!’ he yelled. Not exactly an answer. ‘And don’t panic,’ he added. Always useful advice.
I let go. Entered a dizzying twist. Ceiling, mats, ceiling, mats, ceiling, mats… and yank. The silks snapped tight around my inner thigh. And my head stopped a half meter above the ground.
A beginners mindset means trusting your coach.
Padel
‘You can come and have a hit with us before the real games start, but then you’ll have to sit out.’
‘Are you doubting my ability?’ I smiled at my friend.
‘I’ve seen your hand eye coordination,’ she said. ‘It’s not doubt, it’s being realistic.’
She’d seen me play in the first couple of years of my beach volleyball career (where the ball is larger, slower, and doesn’t require finagling a racquet) so this was an absolutely fair assessment.
When we played, she took 70% of the balls. ‘Yours,’ I’d shout every time the ball was played through the middle of the court. ‘Yours,’ I’d call every time it got lobbed over my head.
My main contribution was in the celebration department.
‘What a shot!’
‘Whooo, nice ace!’
‘You killed that point.’
‘Let’s crush them…’ (as we trailed 1 game to 4)
‘You’ve got skills!’
After the game she told me: ‘You weren’t as bad as I thought you’d be.’ The compliment I’d be dying to receive.
A beginners mindset means bringing a great attitude (because you definitely aren’t bringing skills!)
Summary
Most of us are considered experts at something. Or if not an expert, at least proficient. And while our skills are valuable and hard-earned, the more we know about a topic the more likely we are to close our mind to further learning.
Beginner mindset checklist:
Say ‘yes’ to trying crazy ideas
Be willing to spend time on the boring basics
Set you ego aside to ask the dumb questions
Let go of performance expectations
Throw yourself in the deep end and have a go
When you fail, get up again
Trust your coach
Bring a great attitude
In letting go of being an ‘expert’, I’ve rediscovered how to be a beginner. And I’m bringing that mindset with me everywhere.